Just in case you thought my blog was on autopilot, just merrily posting mosaics every week, I am still alive, just rather busy. In any event, I was presented with this meme recently, so I thought I would share.
The apocalypse has arrived, and you are accompanied by three people – the main protagonist from the last game you played, last book you read, and last movie you watched, who are you with?
Last Game I Played: Homeworld
Main Protagonist: Karan S’Jet
Last Book I Read: The Hobbit
Main Protagonist: Bilbo Baggins
Last Movie I Watched: The Sting
Main Protagonist: Johnny Hooker
How This Goes Down:
The Apocalypse is that the sun will be going nova, and there’s no time for humanity to build the necessary space infrastructure to escape. Luckily for all of us Karan S’Jet is all hooked up in the Homeworld mothership, and ready to take away 600,000 people. The obvious choice is to have a raffle to determine who gets to go, and who must stay. These are then turned into coupons which are bought, sold, and generally fought over.
Bilbo, being the good burglar that he is, starts off by stealing a coupon for his own way off of the planet. And, while he’s at it, he steals one for each of his dwarven friends. He’s got one day left, and has coupons for everyone except Thorin, so sets out to get the last one and get off planet. When he finds out that Hooker has a gig to “cheat” at the last coupon raffle (for two), he takes the bait…
The gig is simply to delay the feed of the raffle drawing so that you can outbid anyone else for the winning number before anyone else knows what’s going on. Unfortunately for Bilbo, the hoax is on him – the feed is delayed, but he’s tricked into selling the real winning number to make the cost of the fake one fed to him. Hooker and I get the real winning raffle tickets, and the associated coupons, to get off planet.
In the end, Bilbo ends up giving his coupon to Thorin, and uses the ring to sneak on board anyway. We all make it off the planet, and get into hyperspace just before the sun goes nova. Now we just have to deal with those pesky Taiidan, who are claiming we broke some 4,000 year old treaty…
LIES! You did not watch The Sting as your most recent movie. I declare you a cheater!
I demand to see how the apocalypse would have worked out with Harry Potter. However, your story was entertaining, and as such I will let you go with a simple fine.
MEME VIOLATION
NOTICE: This meme was improperly blogged. Violations are as follows.
[x] You have falsified the most recent movie watched at the time of discovering this meme. The actual movie watched was: Harry Potter and the Really Lame Plotline and the actual protagonist was Hairy Otter
This blog’s violation has been permanently recorded into
YOUR WIFE’S MEMORY
and as such, the underwritten
PLAID MENTAT
is liable for a fee of
TEN HUGS
to be delivered to the arresting officer by
HER BIRTHDAY
Thank you for your cooperation.